“Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.” Ephesians 5:22 ESV
Whenever this verse comes up in a sermon, my husband always gives me a mischievous smile and I, in turn, just roll my eyes at him. This is the verse that causes women everywhere to groan at the thought of submitting themselves to their husbands. In America, with its feminism-encouraged culture, women are pushed to be strong and independent. Unfortunately for Craig, I am both of those and a little (okay, a lot!) more! However, I have learned over the years that submitting to your husband is not a bad thing.
The Webster’s Dictionary’s definition of submitting is: “to yield oneself to the power or authority of another.” – short and to the point. What about the Biblical definition of submission?
John Piper has one of the best definitions of biblical submission: “Submission is the defined calling of a wife to honor and affirm her husband’s leadership, and to help to carry it through according to her gifts.”
So why is it so hard to submit to my husband sometimes? The answer is simple: the enemy doesn’t want me to do so because if I do, I am following God’s command.
No More Perfect Marriages
A few weeks ago, Craig and I attended the “No More Perfect Marriages” retreat hosted by Jill and Mark Savage. After 18+ years of marriage, we could use a little tune up. It was a fantastic weekend, and we were able to really talk through some things that had been building up throughout the years. While “submitting” wasn’t a topic that was specifically brought up, the Lord had indicated in my heart that I needed to start submitting more to Craig. To submit is to honor God and His Word. When I step out of His design, things do not go well at all.
As Christ is the head of the church, Craig is the head of our household. When I accepted Christ as my Savior, I submitted to Him with the knowledge that He is the head of the church, my protector, and my best friend. In marriage, I submitted to Craig by acknowledging that he is the head of the household, my protector, and my best friend. By doing this, I let Craig know that I love, trust, and respect him.
Has it been easy?
Not at all!
However, looking back over the years of marriage, I have submitted more than I thought I have.
I submitted to Craig all those years ago when he urged me to go to the “Women of Faith” conference with some women that I hardly knew, which turned out to be one of the best weekends of my life. I submitted when he insisted on taking me to the hospital when I was in pre-term labor with Grant. I have submitted to him when it comes to finances, where we would go on vacations, what vehicle we should buy, and numerous other things, that, at the time, I didn’t think I was submitting to him.
Submitting is a work-in-progress and is hard, but so is marriage! Craig and I have been through a lot, but I wouldn’t trade it for anything. We are stronger together, and with Christ at the head of our marriage, we can get through anything!
Our Family – Grant, 16; Missy; Connor, 14; and Craig. May 22,2018
John Piper’s article on submission can be found here: https://desiringgod.org/articles/six-things-submission-is-not.
For more information on the “No More Perfect Marriages” Program, please visit: https://nomoreperfect.jillsavage.org/no-more-perfect-marriages/
My name is Missy, and I love Jesus!
I am a Christ-follower, wife, mom, author, and speaker.
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